If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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