I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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