hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
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