loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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