the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
