This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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