Your dad touched me again.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
tonight lets celebrate not being married
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
