where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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