If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
