I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
