I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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