I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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