you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
