I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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