Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
