do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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