in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Did you pee in the oven last night??
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
