I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
