My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Randomize