Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
