I'll bet she douches with gravy.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Randomize
