I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
