Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Semen is not good for contacts.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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