All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
