He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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