I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
