I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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