so explain again why im purple
no
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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