Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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