Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Randomize
