Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Randomize