my sisters under your porch take her home
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
