nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
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