Little spoons don't ask big questions
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
