You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
