I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
