You're completely useless in the revolution.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
