Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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