maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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