living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
