I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize