What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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