Your favorite bartender is back from prision
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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