do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
