i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
