I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
