Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
