the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
