well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
