I murdered the dance floor call the cops
i already hear my dad disowning me
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
