You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
