i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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